It's Saturday, April 17th. It's an '8' day, numerologically (did you feel successful?) and we've moved into a 'flower' period, biodynamically for the next two days.
After a rather abusive conversation this morning, I left a Zoom meeting.
This is the second time of feeling verbally humiliated by this particular person - and I realized it was time to take my own advice:
"The Universe is generous; lessons are repeated until they are learned."
Perhaps there was also a component of:
fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me?
It's not very dramatic to leave a Zoom meeting - there's no storming out, or slamming doors; I felt amazingly calm, actually.
It was just time to go.
For the rest of the day, I worked on quiet, peaceful projects, humming along at a sustainable speed.
Somehow, it felt like it was a test...
A test of courage. A test from my Soul.
And I passed!
Seems like this was part of today's energy:
"Gate 3: Difficulty at the Beginning Gate of Ordering The fundamental challenge of initiation is to transcend confusion and establish order. Individual expression that through example mutates others.
Line 2 - Immaturity The unrestrained acceptance of guidance. Exaltation: The unrelenting energy for growth will eventually triumph. The energy and potential for individual mutation. Detriment: Internal instability which both accepts and rejects authority simultaneously. Energy and potential that is conditioned by others leading to instability.
Am I done being conditioned in ways that lead to instability? Apparently so...
How about you?
Are you recognizing what that conditioning is? How it's taking place?
Am I done being 'immature' and accepting unrestrained guidance? Externalized authority?
There may be a little more clearing to do...
In the meantime, I'll comfort my Inner Child; tell her how proud I am of how she stood up for herself, bravely! Healing years of PTSD.
We'll have a chocolate cake and tea.